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Love yoself because WHY THE HECK NOT?!?!

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Love yoself because WHY THE HECK NOT?!?!

Gotta love the sweet Fellow Human inside ❤️

Ani Castillo
Feb 11
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Love yoself because WHY THE HECK NOT?!?!

anicastillo.substack.com

My dear friend, every year I set myself one lofty goal or another. This year, my goal is to learn how the hell to love myself once and for all.

The interesting thing is that, I’m pretty good at loving people (or those are the reviews I’ve received, anyways!).

But when it comes to myself, I’ve always had a bit of a hard time.

I tend to be harsh and impatient with myself a lot of the time. I don’t forgive myself very easily for my mistakes. I criticize and scold myself quite a bit. I compare myself to others quite unfavourably and then get all sad about it. I overlook the good things I do and fixate on the things I don’t do.

Anyways! Enough about that!

This whole entire year I’ve been working at this thing quite relentlessly.

I was looking at my journal, and, at the beginning of this month, I wrote this poem.

(I photographed the pages, but I transcribed it below)

I really wanted to share it with you ❤️


February

Month of LOVE

Because I want to learn

I want to get better

at loving ME.

What?

Does it sound weird?

Does it sound futile?

As an exercise?

I suppose it does.

I suppose it doesn’t count

when someone isn’t there

To support me.

To love me.

To be tender

towards me.

And because

I’ve chosen

paths of love

which have brought me

self-destruction

self-abandonment

self-delusion

self-inflicted agony and despair.

WHY?

Well, when I blink

for a second

to think about it

it is simply because

I never took the time

to realize that

I AM A GOOD THING.

I might make mistakes

Heaps and heaps of those.

I might not be

what the world tells me

is acceptable to be.

I might not be

What I always believed

to be “normal” or “lovable”.

But despite all of those

trains of thought

created by some

silly, old, rotten voice

of my past

or voice of my fears

I recognize now

that my real voice,

my actual truth,

my actual ME,

comes and goes

way deeper than that.

The real ME

is connected to the universe.

Is overflowing with love.

With beautiful dreams

with pure, innocent,

wonderful intentions.

How could I not love this?

How could I not love ME?

When I realize

that I was thrown

onto this planet

without a map

without instructions

full of confusion

full of flaws

but completely

bursting with love

and with magic?

I forgive myself

for being made

the way I am

since I didn’t make me.

I accept myself

I embrace myself,

in the same way

I accept the sunshine and the moon.

In the same way

I embrace

The summer and the winter.

We came from the same place,

didn’t we?

We were cut

from the same

universal fibres.

Now I tend to me,

to my garden

with the care and the love

I could give

to a bouquet of flowers

that was given to me

by the very hand

of whomever created EVERYTHING.

Because,

that is precisely,

what I

happen

to be.

With lots of love (and the tender beginnings of self-love),

your friend,

Ani.

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Love yoself because WHY THE HECK NOT?!?!

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10 Comments
Toronto Ink Company
Writes The Colour | Newsletter | Lab |…
Feb 11Liked by Ani Castillo

I love this so much. The way it runs down the page like a river. How true it is. And as a fellow lover of the universe and sometimes hater of myself I was thinking: I wonder if there is someone out there who really, really loves themselves that you could interview. A love expert! Another follow up idea or question is why is it that some of the most extraordinary people in the world struggle with loving themselves, almost or so it seems in upsidedown world proportion to how amazing they are? Also if this post were the first half of a book I would totally buy that book.

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2 replies by Ani Castillo and others
jh
Feb 12Liked by Ani Castillo

that is so incredibly beautiful, simple and perfect. i can definitely connect with your feelings and words. i love the way that you have flipped your negative thoughts and really embraced the beauty in your imperfections and finding the love in just being you. hip hip hooray! <3

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